So this blog was supposed to be an avenue for me to share my feelings during my experience as a new father. I guess I have been coasting along thinking the ups & downs were normal in the cycle of childhood development. Now two weeks before Elliot celebrates his 2nd birthday I am struggling with my desire to make my family happy and a smart, headstrong toddler who knows what he wants. It broke my heart tonight when I heard Elliot's demeanor changes when I drop him off from when Jill drops him off at daycare. I know that I am not being a good parent if I raise Elliot up to be a spoiled brat so I am doing my best to raise him right. I'm glad I have Jill here to help me through this.
Another event that has a lot of emotions welling up in me is the imminent birth of our daughter. She is due on August 20th but since Elliot was born 6 weeks early she can come anytime. Of course I am excited to see her and hold her and watch her grow and develop. However there is the normal anxieties that come with being a parent and being able to provide for my family in every capacity. Again I know with Jill's support we can raise wonderful children.
Speaking of wonderful children, Simon is in the summer before his 1st grade year and he is a full on boy. To watch him learn how to read & write during kindergarten has been a great source of joy. Of course there are challenges as well but at least with Simon we can have a two way conversation. I know he is going to be a big help in raising his brother & sister.
Well I am very lucky to have such a wonderful family and I know that with all these struggles we will all be better people. Also I don't want anyone to think that it's all struggles & hardship. Seeing Elliot light up when he sees me when he gets home and hearing the excitement in Simon's voice when he shares the highlights of his day make everything worthwhile.
